Writing your own vows sounds great but where to begin......


First of all, don't worry about sounding mushy or not "professional". This is from your heart for your partner, not the guests. However, do remember some things shouldn't be shared! Also, remember your first instinct is usually correct. Each set of vows usually lasts between two to three minutes in length. Consider if you want to write your vows together or will it be a surprise for your partner?

If you write your vows together: do you want to recite the same vows or individual statements from the heart?

If your vows will contain religious statements:
       What is your/your partner's favorite verse or passage?
       What verse/passage most reflects your lives together?
If your vows contain a poem:
       What is your/your partner's favorite poem?
       What poem most reflects your lives together?
If your vows contain a song:
       What is your/your partner's favorite song?
       What song most reflects your lives together?

Then write a "love letter" to your partner about your favorite times, the time you first met, what you look forward to with your partner and why you picked them over everyone else.

Take a few days before deciding that you're done so that you can write those little, yet significant, memories down. Your partner will know a lot of heart-felt thinking went into this! Keep a note pad or small tape recorder with you if possible so you won't forget the details that meant a lot to the both of you.

Now put your thoughts and notes into "vow" format.


(Insert partner's name), in honor of you I would like to take a minute to read your favorite poem, sing to you this song, etc...

"In the name of God, I, (insert your name) take you, (insert partner's name) to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."

For the non-traditional vows, you can begin or incorporate your special poem, verse or song....


"From this moment, I, (insert your name) take you, (insert partner's name), as my best friend for life. I pledge to honor, encourage, and support you through our walk together. When our way becomes difficult, I promise to stand by you and uplift you, so that through our union we can accomplish more than we could alone. I promise to work at our love and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart, I will love you. This is my solemn vow."

From the moment we met:
(Insert partner's name), from the moment we met I knew you would be my best friend for life....


Most people go through life never knowing a miracle....

(Insert partner's name), You are my miracle. I am blessed that of all the people in this world, I have found someone so right for me. From this day forward in good times and especially the bad ones, just know there is someone who holds you dear, will treat you with respect and will honor you for the miracle that you bring to my life...

When you finish writing your vows, make one very neat copy to frame or place in an album. In addition, write out note cards to read during the ceremony.

Key Words and Phrases:

  • Best Friend
  • Cherish
  • Commitment
  • Companion
  • Confidant
  • Equal and Partner
  • Honor
  • Journey
  • Love of my Life
  • Pledge
  • Promise
  • Solemn Vow
  • Soul mate
  • Spiritual Connection
  • Sweetheart
  • Through Laughter and Tears
  • Together Our Hearts
  • Twin Souls
  • Uplift